Conversation with The Kraken: How Do You Want Your Eggs?
A brief glimpse into the the way the cogs turn in the household of a married writing team where harmony and plentiful ideas abound… (ehem)
Scene: George has been up since 6am because she had a genius IDEA that she promptly forgot once distracted by dead thing surly cat has made dead. It’s 10am. The Kraken has just emerged.
Kraken: BLARGH. (Yawns, scratches, snorts)
George: Good Morning! Do you want coffee? I’ve drunk lots of coffee. What about breakfast? What do you want for breakfast? Do you want to go for a walk? It’s not snowing today. We could walk. Do you want to walk?
Kraken: (Holding up hands in traditional ‘warding off evil’ gesture.) AAAGGGHHH BLAAARGGHH GOAWAY
Me: Did you sleep well? Oh my God you should see what the cat did to a shrew last night. There were like entrails everywhere—like, right all over doormat… and some inside… I almost stepped in them. Where are you going? Back to bed? Why? But it’s such a lovely day!!!!!!!! And you know, I was wondering why eggs aren’t called ovums by hipsters. You know, you could have a wobbly chicken ovum for breakfast. Do you want a wobbly chicken ovum? It’s my new hipster terminology. That I made up. Do you think that would work in a book? How about diced chicken ovum. I’m hungry. Do you want breakfast now?
Kraken: And this is why I need tentacles. Lots of tentacles. (Exits scene, stomps upstairs.)
Sometime later a pillow is dropped on George’s head from above. Muffled maniacal laughter is heard soon after.